Sunday, November 25, 2012

More Headaches and Best Sex

Ninety nice percent of the time I am happy with my life. I enjoy and am challenged by my 'real' job and I have amazing friends and family. I live alone and am not in a serious relationship more by choice than anything else. Howie and I spend a decent amount of time together, and the fact that it isn't a regular occurrence makes it that much more special. So, with that said, I'm going to whine for a very short period of time, and then go back to my normal cheery (and horny) self.

Nights like last night are one of the few nights when I don't want to be home alone. After driving 800 miles to visit family, and participating in some of the requisite family drama, I was only too pleased to get back to my quiet little apartment. Until I stopped the car and realized that it still felt like the car was still moving. And it still felt like that an hour later.

I got into bed and thought back to the time I had a migraine and Howie made me cum so I would feel better. I tried to make myself get off to see if that would help. And after four nights of sleeping in a single bed with someone else in the same room, you'd think it would be a two minute orgasm! Instead, I laid there and felt more and more gross. Until I fell asleep at 9:15.

This morning I woke up headache-free, read some smut (complete with missing orgasm) and then continued on my way. And I wouldn't have have thought to mention my angst until the NY Post article Nobody Marries Their Best Sex Ever popped up in my twitter feed.

Most of my last few partners have been great sex. Howie, who I know I don't have a serious future with, is by far the best. What makes us great together is the amount of time we've spent learning what we like and what we want together. The one partner that wasn't that great was someone I could have seen a future with in other parts of my life, but would have forced me to spend a lot of time hiding out with a hitachi wand.

The article discusses how kids play a factor in the 'good sex' versus 'ok sex' with a partner decision: the more passionate your sex life is, the less stable other parts of your life may be. I know that I'm not planning to have children at this stage in my life, but am still open to the idea of finding someone to settle down with (although it isn't my life goal). I'm willing and able to take care of myself, and expect someone that I get into a serious relationship with to be able to do the same, knowing that there is always some give and take in any relationship.

So I guess my question is this: do I automatically rule out an amazing sex partner as a longterm life partner? Would I rather have someone who would do the laundry or someone who will rub my clit and give me an orgasm to make my migraine go away (or fuck me on the beach for that matter)? Is there a compromise between the two? I have friends who are all over the map, from happy and adventurous, to unhappy and unadventurous.

I don't think these are questions that I'm necessarily ready to answer right now, but something to keep in the back of my mind over the next few years. And I'm also curious to hear anyone else's opinion on the topic.

Sunday, November 18, 2012

50 Shades of ....

Let me start this off by saying I am not a big fan of the "Fifty Shades of Gray" books. Beyond the author's mediocre grasp of the English language and improper use of grammar, she lost me when Ana deep throated a cock the first time she ever gave head and absolutely loved the experience. I don't have a single friend who loved cock-sucking from the first time and was also that great at it from the beginning. It's an art for most people, something that is grown into with time and a good partner.

But that isn't the topic of this post!

Beyond sex, another of my top five activities is cooking. I adore reading cooking magazines, cooking blogs and cooking for friends and family. I start looking forward to Thanksgiving (and any other cooking holiday) at least a month ahead of time.

To my delight and surprise, I came across a twitter mention of a book called "Fifty Shades of Chicken" a few weeks ago. I started following the author's twitter feed (@50ShadesChicken) and started enjoying the author's witty 'food erotica' tweets. I've never seen anything else that combined these two topics together so well. I haven't had a chance to buy the book yet, but I'm sure it'll be delivered in a package really soon.



What intrigues me the most about reading the book will be if I can actually pull off making erotic meals. Food is so often the beginning of a romantic evening, and I've planned many meals with sex as the ultimate goal. The tastes, colors and textures can all lead to something special, ranging from a bowl of pasta and a simple salad to Julia Child's Boeuf Bourguignon. Stay tuned as I try to share some food experimentation with you.

Saturday, November 17, 2012

The Pagoda

Howie and I don't often have time to ourselves. We work long hours while traveling, and generally socialize with co-workers at the end of the day. We managed to find a few hours to ourselves one evening a few weeks ago and slipped away for dinner and a drive.

Naturally, it only took a few miles before I took his cock out of his pants and I tried to launch myself over the center console for a taste. The angle wasn't that great (and I was trying to navigate), so he had to make do with a hand job. I tried to make up for the lack of blow job by licking my hand every few minutes to make his cock nice and wet.

I assumed our fun was over once we pulled off the interstate and was trying to compose myself when I inadvertently gave him bad directions. We pulled into a seedy motel parking lot to turn around and somehow ended up behind the motel, hidden from the four lane road that we had pulled off of. Howie suddenly slammed on the brakes and put the car in park. It didn't take long before my feet were on the dashboard, my panties slipped to the side and one of his fingers inside me while another played with my clit. I was already excited from playing with his cock and relished the feeling of his finger inside me. He grabbed one of my breasts and started twisting my nipple, which caused my pussy to clench down on his finger with a screaming orgasm. I tried to hop over the large SUV console to get to his cock, but he grabbed my hair and pulled me back in my seat. "Let's save that for later" he whispered in my ear.

Dinner conversation focused on two things: gossiping about co-workers (which I know none of you want to be bored with) and sex. My hotel room for the past few weeks had a balcony that overlooked a river with a fishing pier shaped like a pagoda. I had mentioned at least 10 or 12 times how "romantic" the pier looked and how much fun it would be to go visit it at night. I managed to throw it into the conversation again, and we hatched a plan to head there immediately following dinner.

Although not too far from the city, the pagoda was quiet and secluded enough to be a good place for a quick tryst. We held hands and walked down the wooden dock to the building. We were disappointed as we got closer to see that the main building was lit with a set of bright florescent bulbs. Further investigation showed another long pier heading off of one side and we quickly headed in that direction.

Without ceremony, Howie pushed me to my knees and released his cock from his pants. I was finally able to get the taste I had been looking for since we left work, and quickly sucked him down. The warm sweet breeze began blowing my hair around, and he grabbed a handful of hair as he pushed my mouth farther down his shaft. I released him for a breath and began licking around his cock head and up and down the shaft towards his balls. After a few more times taking his cock as far into my mouth as I could, I stood up and leaned over the railing at the edge of the dock. Howie leaned over me and ground his cock into my ass through my skirt. We could see our shimmering reflections in the water and the moon on the other side of the river.

He reached around to pull my panties off and shoved them in his jacket pocket. My pussy was dripping from the excitement of the situation and I didn't need any foreplay. I spread my legs, stood on my tiptoes and balanced myself on the railing. I could feel the softness of the breeze contrasting with the harness of his cock as he took me roughly from behind. It took a few thrusts before we got our balance and rhythm down, but Howie soon grasped the railing around me and continued having his way with me. A police car raced by on the road a few hundred feet away, but all I could focus on was the tip of his cock rubbing against my g-spot.

Howie's lips found my neck and bit down. I was cumming all over his cock after a few good bites, with my moans being carried away by the breeze. It only took a few more minutes before he joined me, and filled me with huge jets of cum.

We stayed the way we were for a minute or two before untangling from the side of the pier. As soon as Howie pulled his cock out of a me, a huge glob of cum started rolling down my leg and I quickly pulled my panties back on to stop the flow. I could feel more cum dripping down as we walked back down the dock towards the car, giggling about another spot we could cross off of our sexual bucket list. Although the whole experience couldn't have lasted more than 10 or 15 minutes, I know it is something that I'll never forget.

Sunday, November 11, 2012

Sexual Boundaries

I apologize for my long absence! I was away on an extended work trip...which included a lot of hot sex that will take me a while to catch you all up on.

Before I get back to the down and dirty later this week, I want to talk about something that has been on my mind recently: boundaries.

I love rough sex. Not super rough: I still like to be able to take back a little bit of control when the mood strikes me. And I prefer my pain coming from my partner, not from a whip or a flogger or clamps or another type of instrument. I wouldn't mind a whipping, but there is something about hand on body contact from a good spanking or pinching that really turns me on. Or, of course, getting fucked hard with no mercy.

Howie doesn't get off on pain quite like I do, but he'll happily participate since he knows how much it turns me on. A couple of years ago hurting me made him nervous, but now I think he likes it a little more. We came up with a safe word about six months ago when he started worrying about pushing me too hard. I've never come close to using it, especially because he's always worried about coming too close to my boundaries. All of this lulled me into a sense of complacency that a smack would never be too hard or his cock would never be shoved too far down my throat.

One of my strange (and a little bit guilty) pleasures in life is to have Howie rub a day or two of beard scruff all over my back and ass. It can come before sex as a turn on or after sex mixed with some lotion as a way to cool down. My skin starts to feel raw without lotion, and it's the perfect beginning of some super hot and dirty sex.

We started off like this a few weeks ago, and then Howie continued by biting his way down my back, my ass and then down my legs. He got down to my feet and gave me a huge bite on my arch before biting his way back up. At this point, I was face down, half writhing towards him and trying to push my pussy into his face, and half trying to escape his teeth. My pussy was dripping, and I was so ready for him to start licking me, or to have him shove his cock into me as far as he could. Suddenly, he bit down on my ass with all his might, to try to test my limits to some extent. I launched myself forward and shouted "owwww!" Usually, I'll whimper a bit, or tell him that something hurts, but there must have been something in my voice that let him realize how much of a surprise the hard bite was. He immediately started spooning me and kissing me, and held me close for a few minutes, before we went back to some much more gentle spoon fucking

I'm not sure why this unnerved me so much. Howie did exactly what he should have in the situation by making me feel safe and comfortable. I still love pain, and we went back to similar activities the next night. In fact, I'm hoping for a similar encounter this week. I think I'm more embarrassed with myself. I always thought that if my limits were reached, it would come from something much greater than a hard bite on the ass. Something along the lines of being tied up, blindfolded and whipped, or being denied orgasm for hours would have been my original guess. Another aspect of my reaction could be emotional. I was working 12 or 14 hour days, with little sunlight and mediocre eating habits. Combined with the unexpected bite, I could see this pushing me off a little ledge.

Thinking about this a little more, I appreciate the surprise. Part of what makes sex between us so fun and enjoyable is the unexpected. We never go into a session knowing exactly what to expect, but relish the experience as it unfolds. We may think that we are going to play with toys one night, but instead end up fucking on every piece of furniture in the room. Knowing that Howie will take care of me and make me feel safe after pushing past a boundary makes me more willing to approach those lines and possibly explore sex acts that we've only talked about in the past.

It also teaches me to take into account my general wellbeing when involved in somewhat non-vanilla sex. It isn't my partner's responsibility to know how I'm feeling both physically and emotionally, but mine. And I think that will lead to us having an even better sex life (if, of course, that's possible....)